Where I Am At
I am recently graduated, currently employed, a new Oregon resident, and living in an apartment in the city I dreamt about for the past three years.
I'm not a city native, but I have visited enough of Los Angeles growing up and Portland in college to get an idea about it. Although being and staying in Portland, I still feel like it is just a long weekends stay at a friend's place. Aside from summer internships I have not really had an 8-5 job and as Fall turns I am realizing more that this is where I am at.
I moved here without a job, waiting to hear back on a thing or two, stressed about a thing or eight. But I knew this is the city I wanted to be in and that I had to at least give it a shot. My first Sunday I was checking out a church and during the service I received a call.
It was a job offer!
Prayers answered, amen! Go to church people.
But God spoke to me.
During the opening worship, one of the pastors came on stage and told us he wants us to all get quiet and listen to God and what He is trying to put on our hearts. So the band played some instrumentals and as one does, I immediately started overthinking everything.
"That would be so cool to hear from God, but how do you quiet your thoughts to hear, what am I supposed to do with my hands right now, hi God."
The band began to sing again, I didn't heard anything, its okay, God is good.
Then during the next song, God gave me a thought. (It was like the shower theory where you get your mind off of everything and you get the right answer.)
God was telling "You are not in Portland to experience the city, to eat, or to even have a job. You are here for Me. To be a disciple and a disciple maker."
It hit me.
I have been so consumed by my thoughts of the move and job hunting that I had not even given thought that there might be a bigger reason for where I am at. I am in a new community, with believers and nonbelievers, and there is a definite need for God's love and truth.
I think this is something we need to continually ask ourselves, why am I here? In this city, this job, this friend group. And we should be asking God, reveal to me why You have me here, what do you want me to be doing with the situation You have me in?
"Therefore, since through God’s mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart. Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God." 2 Corinthians 4:1-2